Hawks Eye

Something I found in a forum, it sure seems peculiar to me...try it out and see....

It's official. I hate myself and life will always suck.

Everything I do is linked with Aspergers. I looked up the word "Pedantic" and it's linked to aspergers. Saying stupid things is Aspergers.

Everytime I read about aspergers, I hated myself for having it. All signs point to the disability.

I'm retarded. Socially inept. I hated Valentine's day. It was the day I wished the whole world would just blow up already. Everytime I see a heart , red and pink, or a dumb cupid, I get violent. I was in school, and I tore everything up, screaming to the world how much I hated the holiday. Life sucks. It always will suck.

I never feel appreciated.

I'm a writer. I want to be. I don't know the real reason except unusual freakish interests link to the disorder.

The world doesn't want me. No one would care if something bad happened to me. I ask myself why I'm alive and didn't die of lead poisoning when I was an infant which probably caused the disorder. I don't mean anything to anyone.

Everything I say is stupid, and I hated myself for it. I just feel like punishing myself. I never cut myself before. I wish I was beaten everytime I say something stupid.

Last night I was crying, because I don't belong in the world. I;ve been told that the world doesn't want me. I called myself names, like circus freak, stupid, I'm a retard.

My conclusion, life sucks. I'm just a freak who would never live a happy life, I never did anyway. Since there's no cure for it, It's just going to stay with me for the rest of my life.

I wish there was a cure. I'd do anything to be one of the NT people. Even if it means medication. Even if it means jumping off a cliff.

I'm not making fun of aspergers, I just want to express my feelings. If this isn't allowed I'm sorry. I'm in a very bad mood.

I hate myself for having asperger's. I just want to be normal.